Swift Boat Fans for Bugging the Crap Out of Retail Workers
Adventures in Retail: Day 257
Stupid Old Fart: Do you have that book about what a liar Kerry is?
Me: *deep breath* *fake smile* We have a lot of books about Senator Kerry. What book would that be, sir?
Stupid Old Fart: Oh you know. The one by them swift boaters.
Me: Unfit for Command? No, sir. We are currently sold out of that.
Stupid Old Fart: *amused chuckle* Of course, of course. That's great.
Me: Uh huh. Your total is blah blah blah.
Stupid Old Fart: *keeps yammering* It's number one on Amazon, you know! I heard that it sold the most copies ever in a day. People gotta know.
Me: *twitch* Sign here please.
Stupid Old Fart: Can you believe he tried to get away with it?
Me: Here's your reciept sir. Have a good afternoon.
Stupid Old Fart: Can't hide from the truth! Can't hide, I tell ya.
Me: Uh huh. Right. Buh bye!
So many people ask for the stupid book, we had to put a sign out. Of course, they aren't very smart, so they miss the sign and I have to explain the situation to them. Then, I have to smile sweetly and resist copying down their order information so I can sign them up for a subscription to Hustler.
I can really do without the smirking when they find out it is sold out, too. First of all, hello, TEXAS! Texans love books full of giant lies. Secondly, the reason it is sold out is because the idiot authors started publisizing it before the publisher actually printed them. And since the publisher was probably too busy attending his Rich Christian White Men for the Downfall of Civilization meetings, they ran out of copies.
The Amazon thing is a bunch of bullshit, as well. It's been well documented that these conservative nutbag books get to be number one because conservative organizations run by people who want to keep all of their money instead of, I don't know, helping their fellow man, buy the book by the thousands. Then they end up in some remainder bin or as giveaways at crazypeople conventions. So please, stop with the being impressed.
The only thing that is keeping me sane from all this is the fact that even guys like Chris Matthews and Bill O'Reilly think it is a bunch of bullshit. BILL O'REILLY thinks they are lying blowhards, people! It's like being called black by a three-thousand ton kettle, okay?
Kos has an excellent entry, quoting the most damaging article on the Swift Boat Liars yet. It is no liberal wanking or media conspiracy. The truth is crystal clear. These men are liars financed by Republicans and the Bush administration refuses to directly refute them. Kerry was right on when he said that Dubya is getting other people to do the dirty work for him, which has pretty much been his modus operandi his whloe life. I hope this backfires in his face. Smirking monkeyfaced fucktard.
6 Comments:
You'll probably like MMFA today:
http://mediamatters.org/items/200408200003
Couldn't get html to work, sorry.
"I hope this backfires in his face. Smirking monkeyfaced fucktard."
But how do you really feel?
"Smirking Monkeyfaced Fucktard Loses in Landslide." Yeah, that sounds pretty good.
I work at the bookstore that is/was apparently trying to recall the sold copies of the book, according to a caller on Sean Hannity's radio show.
It's amazing that so many people can't get a simple thing like the title of the book correct.
"Not Fit for Command," "Unfit For Service," "Not Fit For Service" and "Unfit to Serve" are just a few of the options the patrons have given me.
Before the book came out, one customer, a fat white man with a baseball cap and an old Indiana Pacers t-shirt that was trying to explain to the man's stomach that it was just too small to hide his flesh asked for "the book that tells the truth about Kerry."
I've also spoken with several other booksellers, one of whom was accused of hiding the book in the back of the store, refusing to sell it to anyone.
It's the most popular book right now. If we had it, we'd be selling it to make money. One would think that people who would buy the book (not read it, mind you) would understand profit-making.
Jordan Stalker wrote: "Before the book came out, one customer, a fat white man with a baseball cap and an old Indiana Pacers t-shirt that was trying to explain to the man's stomach that it was just too small to hide his flesh asked for 'the book that tells the truth about Kerry.' "
Glad to see a liberal living up to the principle of not judging someone on their appearance.
yoyogurn wrote: "It's been well documented that these conservative nutbag books get to be number one because conservative organizations run by people who want to keep all of their money instead of, I don't know, helping their fellow man, buy the book by the thousands."
Just curious, documented by whom? Do you have a cite for that?
Naturally liberals would never do this, preferring to spend their money on charity. That's why Michael Moore's books flopped and F9/11 bombed at the box office.
And of course liberals would never make wild unfounded accusations when things don't turn out the way they want.
Perhaps I'll buy all my books at Amazon in the future, rather than deal with the attitude of liberal retail clerks. You probably won't believe this, but I do buy books (which require an IQ of at least 100 to comprehend) other than the "conservative nutbag" ones.
Jim C.
zgystardst@yahooSPAM.ISEVILcom
It's been well documented that these conservative nutbag books get to be number one because conservative organizations run by people who want to keep all of their money instead of, I don't know, helping their fellow man, buy the book by the thousands. Then they end up in some remainder bin or as giveaways at crazypeople conventions.You haven't given this a great deal of thought, have you? If they want to keep their money so badly, why are they throwing it away buying books at list and selling them in the cutout bins.
Engage mind, please.
Another example of the liberals being so open minded and inclusive. Nope, no mean spiritedness here. Yeesh, give me a break, and it is suppossed to be us conservatives that are mean spirited and divisive. I can really feel the love at this site!
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